Yu Zi Heng

CHAPTER 9:

48

“This is the palace you've been managing for me!”

A teacup shattered at my feet, tea splashing onto my snow-white cloak, leaving a dark stain.

Sīmǎ Jiéyú cried in despair, her voice piercing my ears.

Princess Xiankang pretended to comfort her, urging her to take care of herself.

The Emperor didn't even bother to investigate, but immediately blamed me for the safflower in the food.

Jìn Fēi, with her large belly, stood beside the Emperor, looking at me with concern, feigning sisterly affection.

“Your Majesty, don't blame my elder sister. I heard she's been going to the study frequently recently, perhaps she's been too concerned with the princes and neglected palace affairs.”

“You're a Consort, not a nanny. What do you need to manage about the princes' studies? You can't even handle a banquet properly, and you've harmed my son. What are your intentions? Do you really think having a prince means you can disregard the entire palace?!”

“Your Majesty…” Jìn Fēi tried to intercede.

“Jìn Fēi, there's no need to say anything. She just humiliated your mother a few days ago. Princess Xiankang is also a royal relative, my cousin. Yí Fēi, you are truly arrogant and overbearing!”

Shū Fēi, who had been observing coldly, and Wèi Zhàoyí, who remained indifferent, along with the beautiful concubines who were eager to fight, all looked at me, waiting for my reaction, ready to pounce and trample me into dust.

I suddenly laughed. If you want to find a reason to punish someone, there will always be one.

“You still dare to laugh? I think you've gone mad! Send a message down: Yí Fēi has been negligent in managing the palace, so she is stripped of her authority over the palace and confined to Shuyue Residence. She is not allowed to leave without my decree!”

Shū Fēi looked at me, her face filled with the satisfaction of finally having her revenge, but if you looked closely, there was also a hint of sorrow at my misfortune.

Today, the Emperor could punish me without asking for a reason, but tomorrow, it could be their turn.

After witnessing the cruel truth of how easily beauty fades and affection disappears, who could truly be happy?

I didn't argue, calmly handing over the golden seal and walking back to Shuyue Residence alone.

As I reached the door, I saw Chen Yuan with his brothers and classmates waiting for me.

Chen Xi rushed over and took my hand, “Mother, Changsheng secretly brought half a wild deer into the palace. Let's roast venison!”

Yu Zi Chen handed me a piece of pastry, “Sister, are you hungry? Eat some green bean cake.”

I said, “Ben Gong is sorry, you guys can't eat at Shuyue Residence today. Ben Gong had been put under house arrest and couldn't see anyone else. Ben Gong will have to enjoy the deer by myself.”

I let go of Chen Xi's hand and smiled at Chen Yuan, “You'll be taking care of the brothers from now on. And Zi Chen, tell him to eat less.”

Then, I looked at Chen Yang, “Stop trying to make fun of Changsheng. Forget that he's your cousin, but think about who else would even bother with you if it wasn't him.”

“And you, Changsheng, even Chen Yang are afraid of you. You can't like someone like this.”

“I like him? I like him, I'm…”

“Alright, go back.”

Before closing the palace gate, I saw Yu Zi Chen crying, Chen Xi pretending to wipe his face with Han Ran's sleeve and not looking at me, Chen Yuan's eyes, which had regained their smile, turning cold again, and Chen Yang complaining to Jiang Changsheng, who just sneered as if he were used to it.

My peaceful heart became agitated.

To make my little monkeys so sad, Emperor, you've gone too far.

You'll pay for this.

49

Confinement wasn't so bad. It had been a long time since I had been so relaxed.

I read books, wrote, painted, jumped rope with Fu Bao, and played shuttlecock.

A few new palace maids were very good at playing beanbags, and Fu Bao ended up with a head full of bumps.

The food wasn't as good as before, but it was still enough to fill my stomach. The only thing that made me angry was that I no longer had goat milk.

Without palace affairs to keep me busy, I slept early and woke up early every day. Fu Bao kept me entertained with different games, making sure I didn't have a moment to spare to think about other things.

But Fu Bao herself secretly cried while she was on night watch.

I was actually awake, but I pretended not to notice. But she wouldn't stop crying, and I feared that her eyes would swell up like walnuts the next day, so I quickly stopped her.

“Silly Bao'er, I have a plan.”

Fu Bao was crying so hard that her nose was running, and she spoke in a nasal voice, “It's just! So! Angry! … Waa… My Lady… Waa… When has she ever been treated like this!”

I patted her head, trying to calm her down.

“Why! Waa… The Emperor is so arrogant… Waa… He might as well be Emperor forever!”

I quickly covered Fu Bao's mouth.

Wow, this girl has grown up after managing the Ministry of Internal Affairs for so long!

She used to get shaky knees just looking at the Emperor, but now she has the spirit to rebel!

Fu Bao, whom I bought for three silver coins on the roadside, has changed. She's become so unfamiliar…

And I want to kiss her so badly.

In the spring of the eleventh year of Tianshou, Jìn Fēi gave birth to a son. She was promoted to Jìn Guìfēi, and the Emperor was very happy with the fourth prince. He bestowed the title of Prince Rong and named him Chen Xu Jia.

From his name to his title, he received completely different treatment than the three Chen brothers. It seemed like he was the real son, and the first three were adopted.

I spent the Spring Festival in Shuyue Residence. I gradually heard less news from the outside world. I only heard that Han Ran, Jiang Changsheng, and even Yu Zi Chen stayed in the palace to celebrate the festival with Chen Yuan and the others, and none of them went home.

Yu Zi Chen is actually very clingy to his concubine-mother; he needs her to coax him to sleep, yet he didn't return home this year.

 

I know they're all holding their breath.

 

I spent almost half a year meticulously planning everything, but I didn't foresee an extremely unexpected event.

 

On the seventh day of the fourth month, someone set fire to my Shuyue Residence.

50

The person who started the fire wasn't sent by Jìn Guìfēi, nor was it one of my enemies. It was a new palace maid who, overcome by hunger one night, found a secluded spot to roast potatoes for herself.

After I took charge of the palace, I reduced many expenses, and both the court and the palace praised me for it. Jìn Guìfēi, unwilling to lose to me, became even more frugal after gaining power.

But while Jìn Guìfēi was willing to make others suffer, she wasn't willing to suffer herself. Her palace was luxurious and extravagant, even exceeding the Emperor's sleeping quarters.

The Emperor slept with her every night and rarely visited other concubines. It was unclear whether he was oblivious to these matters or secretly approved of them. As a result, Jìn Guìfēi was still enjoying fish tongues, a dish that required five hundred sturgeon to make, while the new palace maid in the Imperial Kitchen was so hungry she had to sneak out in the middle of the night to roast potatoes.

I was still dazed when I was awakened by the fire and the commotion, thinking I was back on the battlefield of Xiang Liang. I blurted out, “Father.”

Fu Bao quickly dressed me, put a cloak on me, and pulled me out of the palace.

I didn't know when Fu Bao had become so strong, a pillar of support. It made me feel a little sad.

Thankfully, my palace was always well-prepared, and the palace servants quickly extinguished the fire. I waited outside Shuyue Residence, wearing a cloak. Fu Bao's lips were purple from the cold, so I gave her my hand warmer.

I thought, I need to find a husband for Fu Bao.

Fu Bao was about to refuse the hand warmer, but her worried expression changed to shock as she looked at me.

I was facing Fu Bao when I was suddenly pulled into a warm embrace from behind.

“Zi Heng, are you alright?!”

Shen Duo said breathlessly.

51

My first encounter with Shen Duo was when he beat up Yu Zi Yu.

Yu Zi Yu was seven years old at the time, the most annoying age imaginable. Even I felt like beating him three times a day.

But my brother, I could hit him, that didn't mean others could.

Yu Zi Yu felt humiliated and went home to secretly find some wound ointment. Yu Zi Ling discovered it, and the whole house knew. My brothers reacted the same way I did, first gloating and then becoming indignant—

Who dared to hit someone from the Yu family?

As fate would have it, Shen Duo not only hit him but also had the audacity to come to our house to greet my father for his birthday shortly after.

When I saw him, he was trapped in a trap set by my brothers, who were waiting to give him a good beating.

Shen Duo was caught in a net made of hemp rope. Through the rough mesh, he saw me.

I gave him a radiant smile… then pretended not to see him and walked away.

Shen Duo was beaten into a pig's head by my brothers.

When I took my brothers to the Shen family to apologize, Shen Ying generously waved his hand, “It's fine. Kids fighting is all about skill. Don't blame yourselves.”

Shen Duo, forcing himself to appear despite his injuries, said in front of his father, “It was my fault, not the Yu brothers' fault.”

So, Shen Duo and my brothers spent a year ambushing and attacking each other at various banquets in the capital. They were evenly matched. As they fought, Shen Duo suddenly became an honorary brother of my siblings.

Men's feelings are so strange.

Women's feelings are much more logical.

I'm trying to say that, yes, during the many times I accompanied my brothers to apologize to the Shen family and received Shen Duo at our place for his apologies, I fell in love with him.

As for Shen Duo…

The second time he came to my house, he secretly told me, “Look where I hit Yu Zi Yu yesterday. I purposely made it into a peach shape. Did you see it when you applied ointment to him? Does it look good?”

I said, “Do you want me to draw a map of the mountains and rivers on your body?”

Shen Duo was tall and strong, with handsome features. When he smiled, he showed a set of pearly white teeth, making him appear handsome but also a little silly. “Look at this. Does it resemble the scar on Yu Zi Yu?”

He pulled out a box of peach-shaped rouge from his bosom.

It did resemble the shape of the scar on Yu Zi Yu. Shen Duo had done a good job…

Ugh, stop it!

52

Actually, I had already started discussing marriage proposals at that time.

My father was a loyal minister who died for the country, my mother was a calligraphy master, and my uncle held military power. Both my father's and mother's families were prominent families, and we inherited a considerable amount of wealth from my father, mother, and grandmother. Despite my reputation as a jinx, there were still many people who came to the Yu family to propose marriage.

My uncle was a rough man, but that didn't mean he wasn't intelligent.

He couldn't have become a General without being intelligent.

The people he wanted to arrange a marriage for me with were the heirs of prominent families.

This would be beneficial for both me and the Yu family.

When Shen Duo found out about this, he asked Yu Zi Yu to deliver a message to me: “If you nod your head at midnight, I'll find a betrothal token and come for you at dawn.”

But I refused.

The reason was rather helpless—

The Shen family had been the commanders of the Jinlin Guard for generations, and they only did one thing their entire lives: protect the Emperor.

Imagine, the commander of the Jinlin Guard, who protects the Emperor, marrying into the family of the general who holds a large army. Could the Emperor sleep soundly?

Shen Duo told me, “The world is vast, where can't we find a place? Let’s wander the world together, and no one will find us.”

But would we leave behind his father, who was disabled, and my uncle, who was walking on eggshells, to endure the endless suspicions of the royal family?

I returned the rouge Shen Duo gave me to him, “We have our own paths to walk. I'm sorry.”

That was the only time I hated my own clarity.

Shen Duo went home and caused a commotion, saying he wouldn't inherit the position of Commander of the Jinlin Guard. Shen Ying probably guessed the reason and directly sent him to the northern frontier of Beiyi for training, thinking that the heavy snow there would be enough to cool him down.

Later, he eventually became the Commander of the Jinlin Guard, and I still married someone else.

Outside the Shuyue Residence, he held me in his arms, panting heavily, his heart pounding like a drum.

Apparently, the years of snow in Beiyi hadn't extinguished the fire in his heart.

He said, “Don't be afraid.”

But the one trembling with fear was him.

Seeing that palace servants were about to come over, Fu Bao immediately shouted, “Niángniáng has fainted! Commander Shen, please support Niángniáng!”

Fu Bao's words reminded him, and they reminded me as well.

It was acceptable for Shen Duo to come and help put out the fire at Shuyue Residence, but if he stayed too long, people would find out.

Five breaths in his arms were enough.

I couldn't be greedy.

“I'm fine, Shen Duo. There was a fire in the palace, everyone is in a panic, you should mobilize the Jinlin Guard to protect the Emperor.”

“Look at me! Yu Zi Heng, don’t treat me like this! Can't you even look at me?”

“No.” I turned my back to him, tears streaming down my face, forcing myself not to turn around.

“I've always…”

“I know, you don't need to say it.”

Shen Duo was behind me, I couldn't see his face, so I didn’t have to directly feel his sadness.

“I'm glad you came. I was worried about you when you went to Beiyi. I really liked the rouge you gave me back then. Shen Duo, you should let go of me. It’s not fair to you. Your life isn't just about me.”

“But you're the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

I held Fu Bao's hand and went back to Shuyue Residence, never looking back at him again.

________________

Translator Note:

Damn, I'm so sad reading this chapter. Poor both of them. Sigh. I purposely do not use ‘Ben Gong’ when she's talking with him, to show this is a goodbye to their old love story.

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