Dating Show Side Character, Getting Rich by Roasting People

CHAPTER 17: The First Fallen Male Guest 

　　Lu Shixuan: “?”

　　He was just about to snap back with “what’s it to you” when he saw Ye Weiyang holding back a laugh.

　　...She’s not laughing at Chu Ling’s comment about him, is she?

　　No way. He had to turn the mood around immediately.

　　So Lu Shixuan swallowed his irritation, put on a deep, affectionate tone, and said to Ye Weiyang, “Don’t worry. I’m a very devoted man. Once I’ve set my mind on someone, I won’t change it easily. With me, you never need to feel insecure or get jealous for no reason—”

　　“No.”

　　Ye Weiyang cut him off, looking slightly helpless. “Louis, I think you’re overthinking it.”

　　Lu Shixuan froze.

　　Chu Ling, ever the troublemaker, chimed in, “Need me to translate that into plain Chinese for you?”

　　Ye Weiyang looked at Lu Shixuan with a smile.

　　Her meaning was simple as she told him, “Nice thought, but don’t even think about it.”

　　It seemed Lu Shixuan had not expected her to shoot him down so bluntly. He stood there blank for two or three seconds before forcing an awkward laugh. “R-really? I just… thought you might feel the same way.”

　　What he was trying to hint at was that he had been feeling a little secretly jealous about her dating other people.

　　He was sure the audience would pick up on it and find it romantic.

　　Except the live comments at that moment were saying:

　　【…Someone please explain how men can be this confident?】

　　【You’ve only been on one date with her. Isn’t that a bit too possessive? You’re still at the “getting to know each other” stage. How do you jump straight to asking if she’s jealous?】

　　【This might be hindsight talking, but I feel like even during their first date, Ye Weiyang wasn’t that into him. She just played along to be polite.】

　　【This is exactly the kind of guy you shouldn’t humor. Good thing Chu Ling’s here to handle him. Hilarious.】

　　【Two lines from Chu Ling and he quiets right down.】

　　【Fighting fire with fire. Chu Ling’s the perfect counter to greasy, narcissistic men.】

　　“Hiss.”

　　Sure enough, Chu Ling crossed her arms and shivered like she’d just been slimed with grease.

　　“We've only just met…”

　　She counted on her fingers, then smirked. “What, just a few days? And you’ve already decided you’re head over heels and will love her till death? That’s a bit much, isn’t it?”

　　Lu Shixuan: “…”

　　No, seriously, why are you still here!

　　But with Ye Weiyang standing there, he couldn’t exactly tell Chu Ling to leave, so he swallowed the loss and walked away himself.

　　Once he was gone, Ye Weiyang finally sank onto the sofa to rest.

　　“You okay? Chu Ling asked.　

　　“…A bit tired.”

　　Ye Weiyang pressed her fingers to her temples, looking exhausted. It wasn’t just the walking all day. Coming back and having to deal with a self-important guy on top of it was draining.

　　Chu Ling chuckled. “Don’t tell me Lin Zirun also took you to City Walk?”

　　“…”

　　“Not exactly,” Ye Weiyang replied. “We just walked along the beach all day.”

　　Being a polite person, she chose to mention the positives. “He was pretty good, actually. Quite considerate.”

　　What she didn’t say was that he wasn’t quite what she had imagined.

　　One reason she joined the show was, yes, to get some exposure — she needed to build her name and attract more clients.

　　The other reason was that she also held a bit of hope for romance.

　　She had met all sorts of people in the entertainment industry and been disappointed by most male celebrities, but she thought maybe dating shows, with mostly ordinary people, might be more genuine.

　　Turns out… not really.

　　The male guests were like trash bags, each one more stuffed with nonsense than the last.

　　After going in circles with them, she realized the most genuine person on the whole show was…

　　Her gaze landed on Chu Ling, and her feelings were complicated.

　　Maybe that genuineness was also just part of an act, but compared to the others, talking to Chu Ling — the famously hot-tempered, uncouth actress — actually made her feel strangely at ease.

　　Chu Ling asked again, “So, how was it compared to your last date?”

　　Ye Weiyang thought for a moment, then made a pained face. “Hmm…”

　　Leaving the actual date aside, Lu Shixuan had spent almost the whole time talking about himself, flaunting his knowledge. Even pretending to be interested had been exhausting for Ye Weiyang.

　　She had no idea where he got the confidence to think she would be jealous because of him.

　　“Do you really need that long to think about it?”

　　Chu Ling let out a laugh. “Or is it just that neither one is any good? Like picking the ¹tallest midget in the room.”

　　Ye Weiyang was startled. That was exactly how she felt, but how could Chu Ling say it so bluntly on camera?

　　“There’s no need to force a choice,” Chu Ling went on. “Both of them look like they have potential to be scumbags.”

　　Ye Weiyang blinked. “Why do you say that?”

　　“I can read faces,” Chu Ling said without missing a beat. “Look at them — full foreheads, long mid-faces, but thin lips. That’s the natural face of a scumbag.”

　　Ye Weiyang: “?”

　　【Is Chu Ling okay?!】

　　【Isn’t this basically slander? Just because she doesn’t like the two male guests doesn’t mean the Female Guest No.3 can’t like them.】

　　【Hilarious! It’s more like no one likes her. Their dates end and the first thing the guys do is look for someone else. She’s just salty.】

　　【Although… I can’t explain why, but I also get a bad feeling from those two.】

　　【Come on, stop exaggerating. Male Guest No.1 might be a bit smug and narcissist, but there’s no proof he’s actually a scumbag. Who is Chu Ling to play matchmaker and warn others?】

　　Ye Weiyang thought about it for a moment, then nodded seriously. “Got it.”

　　Two hours later, Wen Shu and Qin Shuo came back together.

　　One glance and Chu Ling felt something was off.

　　The more she tried to separate Qin Shuo from Wen Shu, the more things went the other way. Was this the unshakable fate of the original novel’s male and female leads?

　　“…Who would have thought he’d pick the planetarium.”

　　Wen Shu sat down next to Chu Ling, looking a little glum.

　　The planetarium’s vibe didn’t match the dignified image of a top Film Emperor at all. Wen Shu had been sure it wasn’t his choice, which was why she picked it — only to end up falling right into the trap.

　　Chu Ling also found it a little strange, but she still tried to comfort her. “Alright, guess who I got paired with?”

　　Wen Shu thought for a moment. “Don’t tell me it was Lin Zirun again?”

　　Chu Ling said, “Lu Shixuan.”

　　Wen Shu: “…”

　　She honestly couldn’t tell which of them had the worse luck.　　

　　—

　　Before long, it was time to send the nightly “crush message.”

　　Normally, whether you actually felt anything or not, the day’s text would go to whoever you’d gone on a date with. It was just basic courtesy and saved face for everyone.

　　But after thinking it over, Lu Shixuan decided not to send one to Chu Ling.

　　For one, things between them were already close to falling apart, so there was no point in messaging her. For another, after weighing his options, he decided he wanted to hold on to Ye Weiyang instead.

　　Gao Yan and Jiang Yicheng had already gone on two dates. Qin Shuo was clearly aiming for Wen Shu, and Lu Shixuan couldn’t compete there. That left Ye Weiyang as his best choice.

　　Everyone knew the most flattering image you could have on a dating show was being the guy who chases one person to the very end, success or failure be damned.

　　Spending the past two days with Chu Ling had been nothing but bad luck. He could see his reputation sinking.

　　To salvage it, Lu Shixuan decided to go all in on Ye Weiyang.

　　So, for the first time, he broke the unspoken rules of the show and sent Ye Weiyang an anonymous text:【The more sights I’ve seen, the more certain I am about the kind of person I truly want. Good night.】

　　That should be enough to patch up his image a little.

　　With that hopeful thought, Lu Shixuan drifted off to sleep.

　　—

　　The next morning, since the production team hadn’t scheduled any activities, none of the guests had gotten up yet.

　　But in the empty public area’s livestream room, the comments were flying by faster than ever, even more active than when people were actually there.

　　【They’re still sleeping? Hurry up and wake up, the drama’s here!】

　　【Do you think when the guests wake up, they’ll realize the sky has fallen?】

　　【Wait, what? I have no idea what’s going on. Someone fill me in!】

　　【Go check Weibo. Lu Shixuan’s ex-girlfriend just came out and exposed him!!!】

________________

Glossary:　

¹“The tallest midget” is an English idiom/metaphor.

It means:

👉 Among a group of people/things that are all bad, weak, or inadequate, one may be slightly less bad, but that doesn’t make it truly good.

So in that line:

Chu Ling let out a laugh. “Or is it just that neither one is any good? Like picking the tallest midget in the room.”

She’s mocking that both options are useless, and even if one seems “better,” it’s still worthless—like saying “the best of the worst.”

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