Dating Show Side Character, Getting Rich by Roasting People

CHAPTER 31: Just How Strong A Filter Do You Have To Call Chu Ling Cute?

　　Maybe it was because Sheng Yi sounded so matter-of-fact that Chu Ling instinctively felt like it made sense, so she went along with it.

　　It wasn’t until a couple of seconds later that she realized something was off.

　　Hold on.

　　This isn’t like elementary school, where if Wen Shu gets a little red flower and she doesn’t, so they have to split things evenly.

　　This is a dating show!

　　If Sheng Yi really liked Wen Shu, then even if she already had a hundred plushies, he should still give her the hundred and first one.

　　Chu Ling tilted her head, glancing at Wen Shu hugging her bunny like it was the most precious thing in the world, not even caring about Sheng Yi, and thought for a moment.

　　Could it be that this guy is trying that whole “play hard to get” strategy?

　　After all, today’s four-person battlefield date with Qin Shuo had him openly throwing out confession after confession to Wen Shu. Maybe Sheng Yi was feeling the pressure too, and now he was trying to test Wen Shu’s reaction.

　　Brother, do you not know how to date at all?

　　Chu Ling complained silently.

　　With Wen Shu’s personality, even if she wasn’t happy, she’d never show it. Pulling this trick would only push her further away.

　　From their earlier interactions, Chu Ling had thought Sheng Yi was at least somewhat reliable—at the very least, they worked together well when it came to roasting Qin Shuo.

　　Sure, the enemy of my enemy isn’t necessarily a friend, but hey, the more people annoying Qin Shuo, the better.　　

　　“Are you sure?”

　　Chu Ling, in a rare moment of kindness, reminded him, “Don’t you have someone else you’d rather give it to?”

　　Sheng Yi paused, then seemed to think about it.

　　“There is, actually,” he said.

　　Chu Ling thought, nice and straightforward, go ahead and hit Qin Shuo with a direct strike. Let him stew over not even being able to hand out the cheapest little trinket.

　　“My niece,” Sheng Yi said with a chuckle. “She really likes teddy bears, but she’s overseas, so she won’t be able to get this anytime soon. I’ll just buy her one next time.”

　　Chu Ling: “…”

　　Chu Ling was speechless for a moment, then pushed the bear back toward him. “I’m not about to snatch toys from a kid. You should mail it to her.”

　　“I was joking.”

　　Sheng Yi reached out and patted the bear’s head. “Do you not like it?”　　

　　It wasn’t that she disliked it.

　　Chu Ling had to admit, the bear was pretty cute.

　　But then she thought of her own image, and with a scowl said, “Do you really think this suits me?”

　　She was supposed to be the villain everyone hated. Holding a fluffy teddy bear would completely ruin her aura.

　　Sheng Yi lowered himself onto one knee so he was eye level with her, looked at her for a few seconds, then raised his brows. “I think it suits you just fine.”

　　He pointed out one by one: “Both have round eyes.”

　　“Both have pointy noses.”

　　“Both have small mouths.”

　　Then he smiled. “Aren’t you both cute?”

　　【?!】

　　【Holy crap, Shengqilingren just leveled up again!】

　　【At first I thought he was just being a gentleman, making sure Chu Ling didn’t feel bad for not winning a prize. But this line… this line hits different.】

　　【I swear this isn’t me shipping them blindly. How thick does your filter have to be to call Chu Ling cute?! Sir, what is your definition of cute exactly?】

　　【Fine, I can accept people saying Chu Ling is pretty, good-looking, or funny. Those are all objective. But this is the first time I’ve ever heard someone call her cute. Brother, what are you doing?】

　　【Wait… is it just me or did Chu Ling glitch?】

　　【I was fully expecting her to roll her eyes the next second and say “gross, this trick doesn’t work on me.” Chu Jie, why are you buffering instead?!】

　　Chu Ling really did blank out for at least three seconds.

　　He was clearly mocking her.

　　He was a smooth-talking playboy spouting lies on the fly.

　　He must have lost his mind and confused what “cute” even means.

　　Countless possibilities flashed through Chu Ling’s mind.

　　She had been cursed, hated, and despised so many times that it had long become normal for her. So when she suddenly came across a rare evaluation she had never heard before, it made her whole body itch with discomfort. It was like sitting in a pitch-black room for too long and then someone suddenly turned on the lights. Her first instinct was to snap back. (T/N: Aww, my poor baby. 🥺)

　　If it were anyone else, she would have thought, you’ve got the wrong person. Are you sure those words are meant for me?

　　But when Sheng Yi crouched down just now, his eyes meeting hers were filled with a sincerity she couldn’t find any cracks in.

　　That only made Chu Ling feel even more uncomfortable.

　　“Exactly,” Wen Shu nodded, chiming in. “I think so too. You should hold onto it. It looks really cute on you.”

　　Being called cute by someone who was genuinely cute herself only made Chu Ling’s skin prickle even more.

　　“Yeah, yeah, say something nice why don’t you,” Chu Ling said in mock disgust.

　　Wen Shu: “...?”

　　She was saying nice things.

　　“Come on, let’s go, next game,” Chu Ling said as she hugged the bear, stood up, and marched ahead.

　　Sheng Yi watched her back for a moment, then suddenly let out a quiet laugh.

　　After walking for a bit, Chu Ling seemed to catch on.

　　“Oh!”

　　She spoke to the system. “Sheng Yi’s trying to take the long way around.”

　　System: “What do you mean?”

　　“I get along well with Wen Shu, so he’s trying to get close to me first,” Chu Ling said. “Since Wen Shu spends all her time with me and trusts me the most, he’s betting I’ll put in a good word for him.”

　　At least he was smarter than Qin Shuo.

　　Qin Shuo was still busy trying to stop Wen Shu from hanging out with her.

　　But chasing after someone was their own business. Chu Ling had no intention of helping either of them in front of Wen Shu. Not stepping on them was already the height of her kindness as the so-called vicious woman.

　　System: …Wow, was that blow really so big that you’ve gone completely off the rails with idioms?

　　Chu Ling kept walking in front, bear in arms. Without even checking the map, she stopped at the next attraction she saw and said, “Let’s play this one.”

　　“What is it?”

　　Wen Shu hurried to catch up with her and asked curiously.

　　The staff smiled and said, “Welcome to Canyon Rapids. This is one of our park’s most famous rafting rides. Hope you enjoy it.”

　　Rafting, huh.

　　Chu Ling thought about it. Not exactly a thrill ride, but pretty fun.

　　The only possible problem was—

　　She turned her head toward Qin Shuo. “Teacher Qin, are you sure you can handle it? Wouldn’t want you knocking your leg again. Old wounds not healed and you’ll end up with new ones.”

　　Sheng Yi nodded too, adding, “Teacher Qin, do you need a few bandages in advance?”

　　Qin Shuo: “…..”

　　【LMAO here they go again with the snark.】

　　【If Teacher Qin’s leg is bad, maybe he should just sit this one out. Let the young ones have fun instead of tiring out the elder.】

　　【Here we go again. Are these two seriously ganging up on him today?】

　　【Can you blame them though? Once burned, twice shy. If ‘Emperor Qin’ slips and gets hurt again during rafting, won’t the masses have to get on their knees and apologize to his fans on the hot search?】

　　The staff, very tactful, added, “Our rides are very safe. Normally, no one gets hurt.”

　　“Even bumper cars can get people injured. Compared to that, rafting is way too risky,” Chu Ling said. “If it doesn’t work, maybe we should pick another ride—”

　　“I’ll play!” Qin Shuo snapped, finally losing patience. “I’m fine!”

　　If he had known, he never would have faked it.

　　The plan was to intimidate Chu Ling a little and win Wen Shu’s sympathy. After all, Wen Shu was kind-hearted and couldn’t stand to see anyone hurt.

　　But now he regretted it. Not only did Wen Shu ignore him, Chu Ling didn’t show even the slightest guilt for troubling a senior. She didn’t worry about his fan backlash either. Instead, she just kept throwing his “injury” back in his face.

　　Regret. Nothing but regret.

　　If he had known Chu Ling wasn’t a normal person, why did he ever provoke her!?

　　The four of them entered the rafting area in order.

　　“Do you need raincoats?” the staff asked. “You might get wet during the ride.”

　　Chu Ling thought for a moment, then answered immediately, “Yes.”

　　She slipped on a plastic raincoat, then strapped a life vest over it, wrapping herself up securely.

　　The raft was a round boat that could seat several people.

　　For filming safety, the cameraman stayed off. Cameras were fixed at designated angles, while the four of them took their seats.

　　From the shore, the staff called out the launch signal. “Hold tight, we’re about to begin—”

　　With a loud crash, the raft shot forward along the track.

　　Of course, rafting inside an amusement park was nothing like outdoors. There was no real danger. The surroundings had been designed to look like a canyon, with tall trees planted around. At first glance, it really did feel a bit like the real thing.

　　About twenty meters in, the raft reached its first waterfall turn.

　　Everyone instinctively grabbed the handles.

　　The moment they plunged down, a huge wave of weightlessness hit, and water splashed everywhere. Chu Ling lost her balance and slammed her shoulder hard against Sheng Yi’s.

　　Ouch.

　　That actually hurt a little.

　　Chu Ling hissed and sucked in a breath. “You okay?” she asked him.

　　“I’m fine,” Sheng Yi replied. “I’m young, not that easy to injure.”

　　Qin Shuo: “…..”

　　Is this seriously never going to end?

　　【I swear this is going to turn into their running joke, LOL】

　　【Feels like even months from now, if one of them so much as bumps the other, they’ll be like, you okay, need a bandage?】

　　After a few sharp turns, everyone got used to the ride, but just as they rounded another bend, a high-pressure water jet suddenly blasted from the shore, soaking all of them to the bone.

　　“What the— they even spray water too?”

　　Chu Ling wiped her face, half laughing, half exasperated. She thought rafting would just be about drops and turns for thrills. She hadn’t expected artificial rain, aimed right at their heads.

　　…God knows what her makeup looked like now.

　　She glanced at Wen Shu, and it didn’t look promising.

　　Then she turned to Sheng Yi.

　　Sheng Yi hadn’t put on makeup, just styled his hair and dabbed on some sunscreen. Other than his hair being a bit messy, he looked basically unchanged. In fact, with water dripping down, he somehow looked even more like a fresh summer boy.

　　Noticing her stare, Sheng Yi raised his brows in confusion. “What?”

　　Chu Ling snorted. Without changing her expression, she said, “Jealous of you.”

　　Sheng Yi: “?”

　　Finally, the ride ended, and Chu Ling immediately jumped off the raft.

　　Fun was fun, but she was drenched like a drowned cat.

　　She quickly peeled off the raincoat and checked herself.

　　The raincoat had done a decent job; most of her body was dry. Still, one strap of her dress had gotten soaked right at the neckline.

　　She rubbed at it with her hand, then immediately turned to check on Wen Shu.

　　Wen Shu’s dress had only gotten wet at the hem, and she was rubbing at it too.

　　After taking off his raincoat, Sheng Yi jogged over to the lockers, grabbed both of their bags, then casually handed over the stuffed bear and bunny, subtly blocking the camera as he said, “Don’t forget your things.”

　　Qin Shuo caught sight of it right away. It was like he’d been holding his breath all this time and finally let it out. He sneered, “I told you before, you shouldn’t dress like this for an amusement park. It’s too inconvenient, but you just wouldn’t listen—”

　　“Thanks.”

　　Chu Ling took her bag and the bear from Sheng Yi, pulled out the jacket she’d prepared, and calmly put it on, cutting off Qin Shuo’s words mid-sentence.

　　Wen Shu also took out her own jacket from her bag and tied it around her waist.

　　Chu Ling shot Qin Shuo a glance. “Normal people prepare before going out.”

　　As if he had any right to lecture her and act like he saw it all coming.

　　Her gaze drifted down, then she clicked her tongue.

　　Qin Shuo’s pants were soaked too, and of all places, right around his crotch. One look and it would be hard not to get the wrong idea.

　　“So, where’s Teacher Qin’s foresight?” she asked back.

　　Qin Shuo glanced down, and his head went numb.

　　Damn rafting.

　　He definitely hadn’t wet himself!

 

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