Dating Show Side Character, Getting Rich by Roasting People

CHAPTER 68: Couple Intimacy Practice

　　Chu Ling and Sheng Yi were invited to a competitive variety show called “Love Is a Battle to Win.”

　　The show brought in celebrity couples to compete in livestreamed games. It aired once a week, with each recording lasting two days and one night. The participating couples had to take on challenges assigned by the production team, beating their rivals in order to win each round.

　　The ultimate winner would walk away with a special prize prepared by the show.

　　On the surface, it was a game about teamwork. In truth, it was just an excuse for celebrity couples to flaunt their affection on screen.

　　The show had two permanent guest couples whose sweet interactions and perfect chemistry had already gathered a huge fanbase. Each week, two additional “guest couples” would be invited on for extra hype.

　　The day before filming, Sheng Yi and Chu Ling arrived at the set.

　　“The schedule for tomorrow is more or less confirmed,” a staff member explained. “Filming starts at nine in the morning, so you’ll need to be up by six for makeup. Is that alright?”

　　Chu Ling glanced at Sheng Yi, then nodded. “No problem.”

　　“Perfect.” The staff member handed them a key card. “This is your room card. Please rest well tonight, filming is going to be pretty exhausting tomorrow.”

　　Chu Ling blinked at the single card in their hand.

　　“Is something wrong?” the staff asked curiously.

　　Sheng Yi immediately caught on and opened his mouth. “Sorry, could we get another—”

　　“It’s fine, thank you.”

　　Before he could finish, Chu Ling cut him off, smoothly taking the card and poking Sheng Yi’s arm. “Let’s go.”

　　They walked toward the elevator together.

　　When no one else was around, Sheng Yi lowered his voice. “You really didn’t want to ask for a second room?”

　　Of course the show assumed couples would be sharing one.

　　The problem was… they weren’t actually a couple.

　　“……”

　　Chu Ling twirled the room card between her fingers and let out a small laugh. “If we’re going to act, then we should commit to the role all the way.”

　　Of course, if a big-name star demanded two separate rooms, the production team wouldn’t bat an eye.

　　But for someone of their standing to make such a request, it would be far too suspicious.

　　“Forget it. We’re just a pair of small-timers. No point pretending we’re bigger than we are.”

　　Chu Ling folded her arms and leaned against the elevator wall. She glanced at Sheng Yi and added, “Looks like you’re the one who’ll have to put up with it.”

　　Sheng Yi paused for a second before chuckling. “You’ve got it backward, haven’t you?”

　　Ding.

　　The elevator reached the sixteenth floor.

　　As soon as they stepped out and turned into the hallway, they bumped into a pair of people coming out of a room.

　　Chu Ling recognized them at a glance.

　　This is the most popular “Perfect Match” CP in the current variety show, Xie Qing and He Ming.

　　Both were actors who had fallen in love while filming a drama together and had tied the knot just last year. Thanks to the massive wave of drama fans who later became CP fans, the two had risen to fame as one of the industry’s most beloved star couples. Ever since getting married, they had been showing off their affection nonstop.

　　Chu Ling greeted them with a smile. “Hi, what a coincidence. Nice to see you.”

　　“Oh, Chu Ling?”

　　Xie Qing arched her brow in recognition. “Hello. I heard you’re the guest couple for this episode. Welcome.”

　　She added with a teasing lilt, “I also heard a rumor about you… they call you the ¹‘house-collapsing master,’ don’t they?”

　　Heartbeat Lab might not have been a viral hit, but Chu Ling’s sharp tongue and her talent for calling out scumbags had made her reputation spread far beyond the show itself.

　　“Oh?”

　　He Ming gave her a glance too. “In that case, maybe we should stay far away from you.”

　　He sounded like he was joking, but the edge in his tone was hard to miss.

　　“……”

　　Chu Ling hadn’t expected him to come at her with hostility. She froze for a second, then quickly curved her lips into a smile. “No need to be so scared, right? As long as you’ve got a clear conscience, there’s no reason for a scandal to suddenly explode, don’t you think?”

　　She fixed her gaze on the two of them. “Of course, if someone has done something they shouldn’t have… that’s another story.”

　　Their expressions immediately soured.

　　Xie Qing quickly masked her displeasure with a polite smile. “Naturally. If you’ve done nothing wrong, you’ve got nothing to fear.”

　　“Oh, right. I almost forgot. And this one beside you…”

　　He Ming pretended to think for a moment. “I don’t think I recognize you. You are…?”

　　Sheng Yi extended his hand politely. “Sheng Yi.”

　　Xie Qing added, “I know him. He and Chu Ling met on that dating show, if I’m not mistaken.”

　　Chu Ling nodded. “Yes, Heartbeat Lab. We only just got together not long ago.”

　　“Just got together, huh?”

　　He Ming never reached for Sheng Yi’s hand. Instead, he shoved both of his into his pockets and gave a crooked smile. “And already joining a couple’s variety show. Our production team really works fast, inviting just about anyone.”

　　On the surface it sounded like praise, but the second half carried a sour aftertaste.

　　Sheng Yi smoothly withdrew his hand without a flicker of annoyance.

　　After a pause, He Ming quickly tacked on, “Just kidding. I know you two have been pretty popular lately. Welcome to the show, hope you enjoy yourselves.”

　　“We will.”

　　Chu Ling arched a brow, then tilted her head with mock concern. “By the way, Teacher He, is your hand alright?”

　　He Ming blinked. “What?”

　　“It’s fine. Why do you ask?”

　　Chu Ling’s smile widened. “Good to hear. I just noticed your hands have been stuck in your pockets this whole time. I thought maybe you’d hurt them.”

　　She tugged lightly on Sheng Yi’s sleeve. “We’ll head off first. See you tomorrow.”

　　With that, she turned around, rolled her eyes without hesitation, and walked to their suite with Sheng Yi.

　　As soon as she swiped the card, Chu Ling pushed the door open and slammed it shut behind them.

　　Sheng Yi looked at her. “What’s wrong? Still upset?”

　　“You know the answer, but you still ask.”

　　Chu Ling lifted her chin. “Didn’t you see how they treated us?”

　　Sheng Yi wasn’t oblivious. He had noticed too. “They don’t seem very welcoming.”

　　But he only sounded mildly resigned. “That’s just how people here are.”

　　In the end, it was nothing more than the same old meaningless hierarchy games that plagued the entertainment industry.   

　　In the entertainment industry, everyone bowed to those above them and trampled those below. He wasn’t famous, just a band singer with no resources or connections, which put him right at the very bottom of the hierarchy.

　　He had been through this kind of thing so many times it hardly mattered anymore.

　　“What was with that attitude?”

　　Chu Ling, however, was angrier than he was. “Are his hands broken, is that why they’re stuck in his pockets? Thinks he’s all that just because he has a little popularity? If he was really that amazing, would he need to come on a show to stir up CP hype?”

　　Sheng Yi was taken aback by her reaction.

　　A little amused… and a little secretly pleased.

　　“He’s still considered… third or fourth tier?”

　　Her flare of temper made Sheng Yi calmer instead. “So it’s normal he looks down on me.”

　　“Third or fourth tier? At best he’s barely above us. More like thirteenth or fourteenth tier if you ask me.”

　　Chu Ling planted her hands on her hips. “We’re in this together now. If they look down on you, they’re looking down on me.”

　　“...…”

　　He couldn't help but curl his lips.

　　Chu Ling thought for a moment, then added, “Besides, I don’t think it’s just because we’re not that popular.”

　　The production team had invited her as a guest clearly because of her trending power. She was always a magnet for attention, and the other side was probably afraid she’d steal the spotlight.

　　Not to mention her reputation as the so-called ‘scandal queen.’

　　Celebrities all had some dirt on them, and many were superstitious to some degree. They probably didn’t want to be too close to someone like her, who might suddenly snap and expose them at any moment.

　　“Too bad. That spotlight, I’m definitely taking.”

　　After a pause, Chu Ling said, “Alright. Tonight, let’s rehearse.”

　　Sheng Yi asked, “Rehearse what?”

　　“Obviously how to act like a couple.”

　　Chu Ling said it like it was the most natural thing. “When recording starts tomorrow, we need to be fully in character as a couple, without even the slightest crack showing.”

　　A lot of people online already suspected they were just a contract couple faking it for clout. Which, technically, was true. But Chu Ling planned to use this variety show to ‘debunk’ the rumors and make their story more convincing.

　　She held out her hand to him. “Give me your hand.”

　　Sheng Yi froze for a beat. “So sudden?”

　　“It’s not sudden.”

　　“Tomorrow, on the show, we’ll have to hold hands almost all the time.”

　　Chu Ling’s tone was firm. “So we need to get used to it now. It has to feel natural, just like a real couple.”

　　She curled her finger at him. “Come on.”

　　When he still looked a little hesitant, Chu Ling blinked and asked, “What’s wrong, you don’t want to hold my hand?”

　　“Of course not.”

　　Sheng Yi let out a laugh. “After all, my hand isn’t broken.”

　　Hiding his nerves with a joke, he slowly reached out and took her hand.

　　He had only meant to give her hand a simple squeeze, but Chu Ling slid her fingers between his and laced them together.

　　The moment their palms pressed close, the air seemed to go completely still.

　　Sheng Yi’s mind went blank, as if it had exploded into white noise. His blood surged wildly, racing through his veins like it was celebrating, and even his palm grew hot.

　　As for Chu Ling… she had acted so nonchalant just moments ago, yet the instant their hands locked together, something felt strangely off in her chest.

　　Weird.

　　It wasn’t like this was her first time holding hands.

　　As an actress, this was the most basic, ordinary skill.

　　But for some reason, she found herself a little nervous too.

　　The warmth of Sheng Yi’s palm spread into hers, and when she blinked, she noticed her heartbeat pounding much too fast inside her chest.

　　Was it because she had slipped too deeply into the role of a girlfriend that it all felt so real?

　　Her ears grew warm. It almost felt like the flutter of a first love blooming inside her, expanding bit by bit.

　　The two of them sat in the room, shoulders brushing, hands linked, time slipping by in silence as neither seemed willing to let go.

　　No one knew how long had passed before Sheng Yi finally spoke. “...Is that enough?”

　　“Mm…”

　　Chu Ling released his hand, but didn’t forget to critique. “Still not natural enough. We’ll practice again later. Next up.”

　　She tilted her head. “How about hugging?”

　　“…We’ve hugged before.”

　　Sheng Yi nodded. “I think it should be fine.”

　　He was thinking of the day he confessed to her. Back then, he had believed she truly liked him, and that hug had been raw with emotion. That very moment had been clipped into a gif and passed around among their CP fans until they went crazy over it.

　　Chu Ling thought for a moment, then asked, “What if one of the games requires a princess carry?”

　　“My stamina should be fine.”

　　As the lead singer of a band, he worked out regularly to keep up the energy for hours of jumping and running on stage.

　　“So, what else should we practice?”

　　Chu Ling pondered, then lifted her gaze to Sheng Yi. “Do we need to practice kissing?”

　　Sheng Yi felt the veins at his temple throb.

　　This was too much dedication.

　　Chu Ling stepped closer.

　　He instinctively took a step back and quickly refused. “That shouldn’t be necessary.”

　　For him, of course he wanted to.

　　But for Chu Ling, it didn’t feel fair.

　　Or maybe, somewhere deep down, he was hiding a private expectation.

　　In her beautiful eyes, he saw only determination and professionalism, a focus on completing the task.

　　But the kiss he hoped for was nothing like that.

　　Ah.

　　So it seemed Sheng Yi didn’t want to kiss her.　　

　　Well, that made sense. He was still single, probably hadn’t even had his first kiss yet. Of course he wouldn’t be willing.

　　But for some reason, Chu Ling felt a flicker of irritation in her chest, though she couldn’t quite tell who she was competing with.

　　“Alright, let’s call it a night. Good luck with the livestream tomorrow.”

　　After saying that, Chu Ling finally had the time to glance around the room.

　　Fortunately, the program had arranged a suite for them. There was a bedroom and a living room, with a sofa large enough for one adult to sleep on.

　　She turned her eyes toward Sheng Yi, but before she could speak, he said right away, “I’ll take the living room sofa.”

　　He paused, then quickly added, “If you don’t feel comfortable, I can book another hotel room nearby. No one will notice.”

　　“No need.”

　　Chu Ling’s answer came light and easy. “I trust you.”

　　Sheng Yi froze for a second, then laughed. “Shouldn’t you be a little more cautious?”

　　“Of course I’m cautious with other people.”

　　Chu Ling looked at him and said, “But if I didn’t trust you, I never would’ve agreed to fake a CP with you.”

　　She trusted his character, and she trusted her own judgment.

　　With a smile curling at her lips, Chu Ling teased, “We might end up working together like this a lot in the future, ‘boyfriend.’”

________________

Glossary: 

¹House-collapsing master (塌房大师): A person who is skilled at exposing flaws or scandals that ruin other people’s perfect public image or fan illusions, often causing their “idol house” to collapse.

 

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