The Tyrant’s Drama Queen Empress

 CHAPTER 71: The End

　　Shen Ling noticed Xie Yuanxun standing at the entrance of Chang Le Palace, scrutinizing it, early in the morning. She figured he would come in soon, so she didn’t pay much attention. But after nearly half an hour passed, he was still standing there, as if he was determined to stare holes into the palace itself.

　　Shen Ling, “Your Majesty, aren’t you getting sunburned just standing there?” She even lifted a hand, trying to shade him from the sun.

　　Xie Yuanxun gently pulled her hand down and, in one smooth motion, drew her into his arms. His wide sleeves wrapped around her completely, shielding her from view.

　　“You can block how much sun for me? Compared to me, you’re still far off,” he said lightly.

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　—Heh.

　　—Next time I see you out here acting weird in the sun, I’m not bothering with you anymore.

　　—Even dared to look down on me. Very good. If you were trying to make me mad, congratulations, you succeeded.

　　Xie Yuanxun rested his chin on top of her head and asked casually, “What do you think about merging Chang Le Palace and the Taiji Hall?”

　　Shen Ling asked, “Was that what you were considering before?”

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “Mm-hm.”

　　“You still haven't answered, okay?”

　　Shen Ling gave a tactful refusal. “Each of these two palaces has its own unique character. Forcing them to merge doesn’t seem very appropriate.”

　　Xie Yuanxun asked instead, “If we were to merge them, where should we start first?”

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　—Damn it, you’re not listening to a single word I’m saying!

　　—I literally used words like ‘force’ and ‘not appropriate.’ Shouldn’t that be your cue to drop this ridiculous idea of merging palaces?

　　Shen Ling coughed lightly. “No, let’s not. I still want some personal space.”

　　Xie Yuanxun reacted quickly this time. He frowned. “You don’t want to live with me?”

　　Shen Ling said, “It’s not that…”

　　Xie Yuanxun pressed on, “Then why are you against it?”

　　Shen Ling let out a sigh. “……”

　　—Alright, fine, just take it as I don’t want to live with you.

　　—I already said I just want a bit of personal space. If we’re together all the time, waking up together in the morning, going to sleep together at night, and even sticking to each other all day long, sooner or later either you’ll get bored of me or I’ll get bored of you.

　　You really think the so-called “seven-year itch” is a joke?

　　Shen Ling straightened her expression. “Your Majesty, I’m actually refusing this for your own good.”

　　Xie Yuanxun: “Oh?”

　　Shen Ling said, “Think about it. When you came from Taiji Hall to find me, you had time along the way to think about what surprise you should bring me. But if everything is merged together, you lose that advantage.”

　　Xie Yuanxun gave a soft “Mm” and said, “That makes sense. It also gives you enough time to prepare surprises for me.” He glanced at Chang Le Palace with a slightly regretful look. “Fine then. I’ll let it go and spare them, just as you said.”

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　—Alright then.

　　—Not a single loss on your side.

　　—I wanted to get surprises from you, and you somehow flipped it back on me too. Wow.

　　Later on, Shen Ling caught Xie Yuanxun more than once casting strange, thoughtful looks at Chang Le Palace.

　　She: “……”

　　Damn it, so he still hadn’t given up?!

　　He really had too much free time on his hands, always looking for things to mess with.

　　So Shen Ling decided to find him something to do instead.

　　By this point in her pregnancy, her belly was already very large. When she looked down, she could only see her stomach and not the ground at all. Walking had become tiring. Honestly, it would be nice if he could experience what it felt like to suddenly carry several extra kilograms on his body too.    

　　Shen Ling had Liu Zhu make a swaddling bundle, stuffing it with quite a few weighted stones inside.

　　At first, Shen Ling even planned to make a bag that could be strapped around Xie Yuanxun’s waist and abdomen, but after Liu Zhu’s cold-sweat-filled persuasion, she gave up on that idea. After all, if his stomach suddenly looked suspiciously bigger, it would be hard to explain to the outside world.

　　A swaddle was fine enough. At least this way, Xie Yuanxun could hold it and learn in advance how to carry a newborn.

　　Shen Ling was already secretly planning in her mind to make him take care of the baby after she gave birth.

　　She pointed at the swaddled bundle in the cradle. “Your Majesty, you can pick it up now.”

　　Xie Yuanxun measured its size with his hands and looked a little surprised. “It’s this small?”

　　Shen Ling: “??”

　　—What else?

　　—What did you think a newborn swaddle would look like?

　　Xie Yuanxun calmly shook out his sleeves, then reached out and casually grabbed the swaddle by the “head” area without hesitation.

　　“I’ve picked it up.”

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　—Are you actually beefing with your future child, trying to practice how to pinch him to death in advance?

　　—I said hold him, not grab him!

　　—Do you think holding a baby is the same as picking up cured meat?!

　　Shen Ling patted her chest. Whew, okay, okay. Good thing she noticed this in time. Otherwise, when she really gave birth, before she even got to express her motherly love, the child might already be sent off by his father.

　　That would be straight-up horror story material.

　　She quickly stepped in to teach Xie Yuanxun how to hold the swaddled bundle they were temporarily treating as a “baby.”　　

　　“See? You hold it like this…”

　　Xie Yuanxun asked a soul-piercing question. “Like you, squeezing the baby tight against your chest? Can it even breathe like that?”

　　Shen Ling: “Uh… that, that was an accident. I used a bit too much force.”

　　Xie Yuanxun said calmly, “You’re here to teach me, but you’re about the same as me. Neither of us really knows what we’re doing.”

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　—Of course I’m not familiar with it, isn’t that normal? This is my first time being pregnant and having a baby. I have zero experience.

　　—Besides, at least I’m holding the swaddle properly in my arms, not dangling it like some object like you are!

　　Luckily, Liu Zhu was reliable. She had already asked the palace matrons for advice on how to hold a baby, and now she stood nearby, softly guiding this pair of absolute beginners who were about to become parents.

　　Shen Ling said, “You can’t just hold it. You also need to stand up and walk around a bit, gently rocking it.”

　　Xie Yuanxun followed her instructions and even shared his thoughts. “Holding a child isn’t that difficult.”

　　Shen Ling’s gaze drifted away.

　　—Yeah, sure, it’s easy for you now. Did you forget you’re holding a swaddle stuffed with stones? It doesn’t move, doesn’t cry, and doesn’t need anything. Of course it feels simple.

　　—Wait until you’re holding a real baby, then come back and say that.

　　The next day.

　　Shen Ling carefully supported her waist as she sat down at the edge of the couch, her steps slightly awkward with her feet turned outward. By her estimate, she was already more than nine months pregnant now. Recently, the Chief Physician had been running to Chang Le Palace several times a day, and the palace maids and matrons responsible for her delivery were all on high alert.

　　Leaning back against a soft cushion, Shen Ling could clearly feel the weight of her belly even while sitting. A tray of snacks was placed nearby, but she had no appetite at all. Instead, her emotions felt tangled and complicated, a mix of irritability and nervousness.

　　Was this what they called prenatal anxiety?

　　Liu Zhu was cracking walnuts nearby. Shen Ling waved her hand. “No need to crack them anymore. I don’t feel like eating right now.”

　　Liu Zhu replied, “Yes, Your Majesty.”

　　Shen Ling looked around the room but couldn’t find what she was looking for. She asked, “Where’s the swaddle?”

　　She had planned to add a bit more weight to Xie Yuanxun’s “baby,” but it was nowhere in sight. After asking Liu Zhu, she found out that Xie Yuanxun had taken it with him to court.

　　Shen Ling: “……”

　　The atmosphere in the court today was quieter than usual, almost delicate and strange. Everyone stared at the swaddled infant in Xie Yuanxun’s arms, eyes wide in shock. They nearly jumped out of their skins.　　

　　They knew what a swaddled baby was, of course. But no one ever expected to see it… in Xie Yuanxun’s hands.

　　Still, since Xie Yuanxun hadn’t said a word, none of them dared to comment either.

　　What, were they supposed to forbid His Majesty from having a fatherly heart?

　　Besides, the Empress was also about to give birth soon.

　　After the court session ended, the ministers walked out in small groups, all of them still discussing what they had just witnessed.

　　In the past, their impression of Xie Yuanxun was mostly fear and intimidation. Only today did they realize… he actually had such a gentle side?

　　In the end, they all sighed with deep emotion.

　　“His Majesty and the Empress share a strong bond. Truly a blessing for the nation.”　　

　　Thinking further ahead, with how much Xie Yuanxun cared for Shen Ling—and how indifferent he was toward the other concubines in the palace—the future crown prince of Da Liang Dynasty would surely be born of Shen Ling.

　　When that little prince grew up, they, as ministers, would not be dragged into the dangerous chaos of imperial succession struggles. The court would remain clear and orderly.    

　　Looking closer, as long as Xie Yuanxun’s attention stayed on Shen Ling, they could all breathe a little easier. At least they wouldn’t have to stay tense all day, always feeling like they might snap into a startled bird at the slightest disturbance.

　　“Wait, does the Empress really control His Majesty that tightly? Even making him practice being a father in advance?”

　　“Quick! Cover his mouth!”

　　“Mmph...!”

　　“You trying to die? How dare you say His Majesty is henpecked.”

　　“Quick! Cover this one’s mouth too!”

　　“Mmph, mmph, mmph...!”

　　......

　　Shen Ling originally thought she was the only one dealing with prenatal anxiety. She didn’t expect that one night, when she woke up, she would find Xie Yuanxun sitting quietly beside her, completely silent, staring unblinking at her and her belly.

　　Shen Ling flinched, “......”

　　Noticing the movement, Xie Yuanxun said, “You’re awake. It’s still not dawn yet, go back to sleep.”

　　Shen Ling asked, “Your Majesty, when did you wake up?”

　　She reached out and touched his hand. It was cold. That surprised her a little. Just how long had he been sitting here watching her?

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “I never slept.”

　　Shen Ling paused. “You didn’t sleep?”

　　—So… you’ve been watching me the entire night?

　　Wait a second!

　　She suddenly remembered that a few times at night, when she was half-asleep, she had vaguely felt Xie Yuanxun watching her. She had thought it was just a dream.

　　Turns out it was real.

　　Shen Ling asked, “Your Majesty, how long have you been doing this?”

　　Xie Yuanxun thought for a moment. “A month or so… two months? I can’t really remember.”

　　Shen Ling looked a little lost, still unable to grasp what he meant. In the end, she just asked directly, “...Why are you staring at my belly in the middle of the night?”

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “I was talking to him, telling him to come out faster. But I was also worried it would be dangerous for you during childbirth, so I thought maybe he could just climb out on his own.”

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　—Oh my god!

　　—This went from a wholesome scene straight into a horror movie in seconds!

　　—Your Majesty, you are insane!

　　Shen Ling patted the space beside her pillow, signaling for Xie Yuanxun to lie down with her. She said gently, “Your Majesty, the Chief Physician has already said my pregnancy is in a very good condition. The delivery will be quick. It won’t be dangerous.”

　　“Maybe by the time you go out and have a cup of tea, I’ll already be done giving birth.”

　　“Really?”

　　“Really!”

　　Really… my foot!

　　The day Shen Ling went into labor, the pain started from morning and dragged all the way until two in the afternoon. Her water had already broken. Lying in the delivery room that had been prepared early in Chang Le Palace, her hair was soaked through with sweat. In her mind, she kept replaying that conversation from that night, when she had told Xie Yuanxun it would only take a cup of tea’s time to give birth.

　　She seriously wished she could turn back time and shove her own brain into a ditch.

　　“Ah!” Shen Ling instinctively gripped Xie Yuanxun’s hand tighter, her face pale.

　　Seeing her like this, Xie Yuanxun suppressed the anger in his chest and questioned everyone in the room, “It’s been so long already, why hasn’t she given birth yet!”

　　“If anything happens to her, none of you will make it out of this palace gate. I will flay you alive and tear you apart!”

　　“Pff...” Shen Ling, who had been in unbearable pain just moments ago, suddenly burst out laughing at Xie Yuanxun’s words.

　　Because it reminded her of those domineering CEO dramas. Whenever the heroine got sick and ended up in the hospital, the CEOs would threaten the doctors, saying that if they couldn’t cure her, they’d throw them into the sea or send them to mine in Africa.

　　As if the heroine was suffering from some incurable disease, when in reality it was just something that could be fixed with a simple pack of cold medicine.

　　And right after Shen Ling finished laughing, she suddenly felt a release in her lower abdomen.

　　The room was immediately filled with a loud “waaa waaa waaa” of a baby crying.

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　Xie Yuanxun: “......”

　　The other attendants in the palace: “......”

　　Shen Ling fell into silence. How was she supposed to ever explain to her child in the future that their entire grand entrance into this world started because she laughed at the wrong moment?

　　Xie Yuanxun brushed the damp strands of hair from her cheek, then leaned down and kissed her lips. His tone was calm as he said, “If I had known that you could give birth just by laughing, I should have made you laugh earlier.”

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　—Cough, cough, cough, don’t say it like that! I’m just as confused as you are!

　　Exhausted, Shen Ling drifted off to sleep.

　　Only then did Xie Yuanxun finally spare a moment to look at their newborn son. The instant he saw the baby’s face, he pinched the bridge of his nose and said, “So ugly.”

　　Everyone in the room: “......”

　　Xie Yuanxun, completely unfazed by the silence in the room, continued very seriously, “Both the Empress and I are quite good-looking. So why did he turn out like this?”

　　Everyone: “......”

　　The Chief Physician finally peeked in and said, “Your Majesty, the little prince is actually very delicate-looking. It’s just that he’s freshly born, so his features haven’t fully developed yet. In a few days, you’ll see how fair and lovely he becomes.”

　　Xie Yuanxun: “Alright. But he really is very ugly right now.”

　　The baby cried even louder, “Waaahhh waaaahhh waaaahhh!”

　　Xie Yuanxun said calmly, “From now on, don’t call him the little prince anymore. He is the Crown Prince of Da Liang.”

　　Everyone respectfully answered, “Yes, Your Majesty.”

　　Shen Ling slept for a full day before finally waking up. She had already been cleaned up and changed into fresh clothes. Liu Zhu then reported that His Majesty had already declared the baby as Crown Prince.

　　Shen Ling nodded calmly, then immediately perked up and told Liu Zhu to bring the Crown Prince over.

　　But the moment she saw him, her first reaction was, “So ugly!”

　　The Crown Prince: “Waaahhh waaaahhh waaaahhh!”

　　Just then, Xie Yuanxun walked in and heard her words. He burst out laughing, “Pff hahaha!”

　　As soon as he laughed, the baby’s cries went up several notches in pitch.

　　Shen Ling glanced at him sharply. “Your Majesty, don’t tell me you said the exact same thing too?”

　　Xie Yuanxun: “......”

　　Now it was Shen Ling’s turn to laugh. “Pff hahaha!”

　　Xie Yuanxun reached out and took the Crown Prince from her arms. “I’ll hold him. You should just look. You’re still not allowed to move around too much.”

　　Shen Ling rested her head against his shoulder. “Your Majesty, his nose looks just like yours.”

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “Mm. His eyes look like yours.”

　　Shen Ling bit him lightly. “Nonsense. How would you even know? He hasn’t even opened his eyes yet.”

　　Xie Yuanxun let out a soft laugh, the kind of laugh that felt almost too gentle to resist. “I just know. Every part of you is carved into my memory. I won’t be wrong.”

　　Shen Ling kept a straight face. “That’s not exactly a difficult thing to say.” Though the curve of her lips betrayed just how pleased she was.

　　“I remember you just as clearly too…”

　　......

　　Shen Ling stayed cooped up in her room for a full month before finally finishing her confinement period.

　　The moment she regained her freedom, she immediately went to bathe and wash her hair. She came out feeling completely refreshed, like she had been reborn.

　　When she stepped out, she saw Xie Yuanxun holding the Crown Prince. The baby’s features had now clearly developed, soft and fair, adorable in every way.

　　Smelling Shen Ling's scent, the usually quiet Crown Prince in Xie Yuanxun’s arms started making excited “ah ah” sounds. He kept turning his tiny head toward her direction inside the swaddle, but he was still too small, so all his effort basically led to nothing.

　　Shen Ling found this very comforting. As expected, her own child was the cutest.

　　She took him into her arms, and the Crown Prince immediately gave her a sweet smile. Shen Ling felt her heart completely melt on the spot.

　　“Your Majesty, when you were holding him, did he smile this sweetly too?”

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “Even sweeter than this.”

　　Shen Ling: “Really?”

　　—I don’t believe it.

　　Xie Yuanxun gave a soft snort. “Give him to me.”

　　Don’t believe him? Fine. He would show her what it meant to be father and son in perfect sync, unstoppable when they worked together.

　　The moment the Crown Prince was placed into Xie Yuanxun’s arms, his little mouth immediately turned downward and he burst into loud wails.

　　Xie Yuanxun: “......”

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　—Pfft!

　　Xie Yuanxun frowned. “Why is he so fond of crying?”

　　Shen Ling tilted her head. “Maybe your arms are too hard? He prefers something softer?”

　　Xie Yuanxun clicked his tongue. “So young, and already this fickle.”

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　—Just you wait, I’m telling him this when he grows up.

　　That night, just as they were about to sleep, Shen Ling heard the Crown Prince crying.

　　He wasn’t sleeping with them. Instead, he stayed in the side hall, looked after by Liu Zhu and the wet nurse.

　　There had been a moment of whim when Shen Ling decided she wanted to sleep with him. But she had completely underestimated the baby’s energy level.

　　She barely slept the entire night. She had to keep playing with him, keep watching him, and the moment her eyes weren’t on him, the Crown Prince would start crying. On top of that, she had to feed him and change his diapers repeatedly.

　　By the time morning came, Shen Ling silently handed him back to Liu Zhu.

　　Wuwu. Babies with endless energy were truly a test for any mother.

　　Shen Ling said, “Your Majesty, go soothe him.”

　　Xie Yuanxun replied, “Alright.”

　　But after a while, Shen Ling realized the crying still hadn’t stopped.

　　Hm?

　　Hadn’t she told Xie Yuanxun to go to the side hall and calm him down?

　　Why was the Crown Prince still crying?

　　She opened her eyes and sat up in bed, only to see Xie Yuanxun’s hand gently patting a swaddle, one beat after another.

　　Shen Ling: “Oh, a swaddle.” The Crown Prince was usually wrapped in one like that.

　　She flopped back down for a moment, then after a few seconds, suddenly sat up again with full clarity in her eyes.

　　Wait a second.

　　Xie Yuanxun wasn’t even soothing the Crown Prince.

　　The baby was in the side hall!

　　Shen Ling stared at him quietly. “Your Majesty, you’re comforting the wrong one.” He was clearly patting the swaddle he had been carrying around for nearly half a month!

　　Xie Yuanxun: “Ah, was I wrong? I thought this was the real one.”

　　Shen Ling: “......”

　　—Poor Crown Prince!

　　After Xie Yuanxun got off the bed and went to the side hall to soothe the real Crown Prince, Shen Ling pulled out a small notebook.

　　She was going to record all of Xie Yuanxun’s “crimes” properly.

　　Scratch, scratch, scratch—

　　Shen Ling flipped through the pages of her little notebook, already filled with many entries.

　　Some belonged to Xie Yuanxun, and some were hers.

　　She was sure that when the Crown Prince grew up and saw it, it would definitely be a very “special” gift for him.

—The End—

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